It’s been three years since the people of Britain gathered in the streets to eat crisps and watch non-stop televised coverage of Pippa Middleton's arse. To commemorate this historic occasion we’d like to offer you the chance to own some leftover royal wedding shit we’ve just found in a cupboard.
The tea towel features a royal wedding street party subtly rebranded by Mr Tourette, while the mug includes a poetic tribute to Wills & Kate by Drive-by Abuser:
commemorative piss goblet yeah?
got people licking tea out of you
and thinking about the happy couple?
alright for some innit
what you gonna do if they split up?
get dumped in the shed
and filled up with old screws 'n' shit?
welcome to the real world mate