15 Minute Slot Valentine

£2.25

15 Minute Slot Valentine's Day Card Don't bother looking at the starters, I only managed to book a 15 minute slot.

2001 Space Argument

£110.00

2001 Space Argument Giclee Print “does that look like the fucking moon?” “it’s a bit hot, can you turn the fan on?” Signed Giclee print. Limited blind stamped edition of 100.Dimensions: 42cm x 59.4cm. Delivered in flat package to size of print.  

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2001 Space Argument T-Shirt

£25.00 £17.50

2001: A Space Argument T-Shirt “Does that look like the fucking moon?” “It’s a bit hot, can you turn the fan on?”    Available in Small (50cm), Medium (53cm), Large (56cm), Extra Large (60cm). 100% Cotton. Made in UK with Continental Clothing t-shirts.

Alan Horse Piss T-Shirt

£25.00

Alan Horse Piss T-Shirt This classic horse based design has been shit-tweaked to perfectly compliment our stunning Horse Piss Beer cans. Available in Small (50cm), Medium (53cm), Large (56cm) and Extra Large (60cm) 100% Cotton. Made in UK with Continental Clothing t-shirts.  

Alan T-Shirt

£25.00

Alan T-shirt What's he running from? Where's he running to? All we know is somewhere, someone's shouting "you wanker!" at him.   Available in Small (50cm), Medium (53cm), Large (56cm) and Extra Large (60cm) 100% Cotton. Made in UK with Continental Clothing t-shirts.  

Always Be Mine Valentine

£2.25

You Will Always Be Mine Valentine's Day Card

Bit More Specific T-Shirt

£25.00

Mr Tourette - Bit More Specific T-Shirt You’re going to have to be a bit more specific, yeah?   Available in Small (50cm), Medium (53cm), Large (56cm), Extra Large (60cm). 100% Cotton. Made in UK with Continental Clothing t-shirts.  

Bored as Arseholes Coaster

£2.99

"I see from your afternoon tweet that you’re 'bored as fucking arseholes" “yeah cheers, I didn’t know you were following me”  

Brighton Fringe 2004

£110.00

Brighton Fringe 2004 Giclee Print This was the cover of the Brighton Festival Fringe brochure in 2004. “what it is?”“it’s a seagull, I did it with a spade” Signed giclee print. Limited blind stamped edition of 100. Dimensions: 42cm x 59.4cm.  

CCTV Admirer Valentine

£2.25

CCTV Admirer Valentine's Day Card Now in HD.

Customer Feedback Riso Print

£55.00

Work - Customer Feedback Risograph "great to get all this feedback off our new customer forum." "yeah I had no idea we were such a shit company."   One of 100 limited edition signed risograph prints as seen in the 2014 'Decade in the Shithouse' exhibition. Dimensions: 297mm x 420mm (A3) 

Customer Services Kitchen Riso Print

£55.00

Customer Services Kitchen Riso Print "this kitchen I bought off you, has given me manic depression."   One of 100 limited edition signed risograph prints as seen in the 2014 'Decade in the Shithouse' exhibition. Dimensions: 297mm x 420mm (A3)  

Customer Services Pants Riso Print

£55.00

Customer Services Pants Riso Print "these pants I bought off you, there's shit in them, but it's not mine, how do I stand legally?"   One of 100 limited edition signed risograph prints as seen in the 2014 'Decade in the Shithouse' exhibition. Dimensions: 297mm x 420mm (A3)  

Cut Out Heart Valentine

£2.25

Cut Out Heart Valentine's Day Card

Data Analyst Phone Case

£14.99

Got a phone yeah? Why not look after it with this high-quality phone case from the House of Toss. Scratch resistant, thin but strong as fuck and made out of some ultra durable wipe clean polycarbon bollocks. These snap-on cases cover the back and sides of the phone with easy access to all holes for sticking wires in. Next day...

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Decade Book

£28.00 £21.00

NOW 25% OFF! 'The Best Book Ever' – The Sunday Times Style Magazine  'You will shit yourself laughing.' – The Idler 'Already a contemporary cartoon classic.' – The Guardian 'No one captures the frustrations of modern British life more acutely, or scurrilously, than Modern Toss.' – The Independent This incredible collection documents the Modern Toss story from the very beginning,...

Dog at Work Coaster

£2.99

"you can't bring a dog into work." "er hello? he's not actually working."  

Dogging Valentine

£2.25

Cheese and Wine Dogging Valentine's Day Card I see you've got a Valentine's card. Yes it's from a woman I go dogging with.

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Drive-By Abuser Postcard Set

£10.99 £5.99

Drive-By Abuser Postcard Set With a brain so sharp you can almost hear it thinking, the scooter-bound Drive-by Abuser will happily tackle any subject in the world and make some sense of it for you. Wearing a hat, climbing a mountain, the social status of brie on the cheese scene – he’s had a crack at all of them. This...

Drive-by Abuser T-Shirt

£25.00

Drive-by Abuser T-Shirt Wearin’ a t-shirt yeah?  Why not it’s your life, see you 'round yeah.  Available in Small (50cm), Medium (53cm), Large (56cm) and Extra Large (60cm) 100% Cotton. Made in UK with Continental Clothing t-shirts.  

Erection Pills Valentine

£2.25

Erection Pills Valentine's Day Card Come on we'll be late for the restaurant. Hang on, have you seen my erection pills anywhere?

Fucking Typical Riso Print

£55.00

Fucking Typical Riso Print "I want a bank loan." "I'm going to have to take a few details down." "tell you what mate fucking swivel on it, no wonder the country's fucked."   One of 100 limited edition signed risograph prints as seen in the 2014 'Decade in the Shithouse' exhibition. Dimensions: 297mm x 420mm (A3)

Hair Cushion Valentine

£2.25

Hair Cushion Valentine's Day Card What d'you reckon? I had it tweezered out and stuffed into a cushion for you.

Hammering the Fuck Valentine

£2.25

Hammering the Fuck Valentine's Day Card