Decade Book


'The Best Book Ever' – The Sunday Times Style Magazine  'You will shit yourself laughing.' – The Idler 'Already a contemporary cartoon classic.' – The Guardian 'No one captures the frustrations of modern British life more acutely, or scurrilously, than Modern Toss.' – The Independent This incredible collection documents the Modern Toss story from the very beginning, with 560pages and...

Periodic Table Mug


The Periodic Table of Swearing contains a comprehensive selection of the finest swearing insults and is now available on a mug for passive-aggressive tea drinking.   Modern Toss gift box included. Dishwasher and microwave safe.

Tossary of Terms Book


Welcome to Tossary of Terms, the first in an illustrated dictionary series produced by cult cartoonists Modern Toss. This book identifies and defines, with new words and phrases, a random pisspot of contemporary social phenomena which has so far gone unnamed.  The fast changing modern scene chucks up stuff faster than we can nail it down and label it. The...

Mindless Violence Colouring Book


Mindless Violence Colouring Book Achieve a mindful state as you colour in these adrenaline-soaked scenes of mindless violence, created for you by a dedicated team of plain clothes therapists. Experience an overwhelming sense of inner peace as you immerse yourself and your pencils in a world of detail and surprises, including: a man bending a lamppost; a woman setting about a fruit tree with a...

Modern Toss Comic - Issue 9


Comic 9: 'Fucking Arseholes Anonymous' Comic 9 is a 64-page collection including brand new classic cartoons from Cheese & Wine, Work, Drive-by Abuser, and Customer Services. Plus new appearances from Bacon Cancer, Quiet Zone, Towel Sculptor and Random Fucking Internment Camp.    

Periodic Table of Swearing Tea Towel


Periodic Table of Swearing Tea Towel The only tea-towel that will get you fluent in obscenity as well as drying your dishes. The Periodic Table of Swearing contains over 100 chemical swearing elements, grouped by category. 


Work Fuck Off Socks

£8.99 £4.49

The ultimate work sock, contains a powerful message which remains hidden underneath the bottom of trouser leg, unless you’re wearing shorts or a skirt. Mens shoe size 7-11 80% Cotton 19% Polyamade 1% Elastane

Ideas Meeting Mug


"don't think about it, just say it" "fuck you"   Comes in a gift box. Dishwasher and microwave safe. 9.5cm height x 8.5cm diameter.

Ideas Meeting Coaster


"don't think about it, just say it" "fuck you"  


The Working Day Colouring Book

£10.99 £7.99

The Working Day Colouring Book The Working Day colouring book captures the essence of the contemporary workplace while offering you the opportunity to express yourself through the relaxing medium of colouring in. Take some well-earned chill time and immerse yourself in the fractal complexity of a man flagging an important email, someone taking an afternoon Malteser break, a group of workers looking at meal deal options in...

Work Fuck Off Mug


“I can’t come in today, so fuck off.”   Comes with a gift box. Dishwasher and microwave safe. 9.5cm height x 8.5cm diameter. 

Milestone Birthday Card


"do you want to do anything for your milestone birthday coming up?" "no I fucking don't"   You can send this card direct to your mates or family with a handwritten message via Brainbox Candy here. Otherwise, add to basket below and write it your fucking self.


Periodic Table of Swearing Socks

£8.99 £4.49

The Periodic Table of Swearing is an acknowledged 21st century design classic and now, thanks to advances in weaving technology, is available to wear on your feet as a pair of socks. Contains 14 handpicked swear elements beautifully knitted into this classic argyle style design. Mens shoe size 7-11 80% Cotton 19% Polyamade 1% Elastane

Christmas Game Card


''one word...''''bollocks''

Periodic Table Poster


Periodic Table Poster The Periodic Table of Swearing is an acknowledged 21st century design classic. With over 100 swear elements to choose from, you'll never be stuck for the right bit of swearing to shout at your mates again! Poster size is A2


Rainbow Shit Scribblers

£10.99 £7.99

Double Ender Rainbow Shit Scribbler Set The first major breakthrough in pencil technology for many decades. Our ‘Double Ender Rainbow Shit Scribblers’ come in a pack of 12; that’s 24 colours, each with their own unique descriptive name such as: Universal Urine, Colon Sunset, and Supermarket Mince.

Modern Toss Comic - Issue 8


Comic 8 - Route One Bollocks ‘Route One Bollocks’ is the eighth Modern Toss comic, with a classic Neapolitan ice cream colour scheme. Really gets your tastebuds pinging about. Sixty-four pages of stripped down, single panel, laugh out loud cartoons. Includes new classics from Drive-by Abuser, Work, Cheese & Wine and debut strips from Casual Labour, Priority Pervert and Legal Highz.

Work at Weekend Mug


"can you come in at the weekend?" "I'll come in but I'm not fucking doing anything."   Comes in a gift box. Dishwasher and microwave safe. 9.5cm height x 8.5cm diameter.

Line Manager Coaster


“how are you getting on with your new line manager?” “he’s a fucking cunt.”

Bored as Arseholes Coaster


"I see from your afternoon tweet that you’re 'bored as fucking arseholes" “yeah cheers, I didn’t know you were following me”  

Christmas Argument Card


Christmas Argument Card"yeah all good here thanks, we've had the meal and we'rejust getting ready for the argument."

Dog at Work Coaster


"you can't bring a dog into work." "er hello? he's not actually working."  

Data Analyst Coaster


"this spreadsheet of yours doesn't appear to make any sense" "yeah it's bollocks innit"  

Seasonal Bollocks Card


Seasonal Bollocks Card Seasonal Bollocks to You

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