Bullshitters Refreshers Card

£2.25

"I see you took yesterday off for a 'bullshitter's refresher course" "yeah here's my expenses"

Work Retox Clinic Card

£2.25

"I can't come back to work this week, I've had to book myself in the retox clinic"

Work Team Player Card

£2.25

"hi sorry I'm late, I couldn't be fucked to get here any quicker"

Work Impressive Reference Card

£2.25

"very impressive reference" "cheers, I wrote that"

Work Robot Card

£2.25

"I'm worried about the effects of new technology on my work prospects" "Don't panic, we offered your job to a robot and he didn't want it"

Work Amazing Figures Card

£2.25

"these end of year figures are amazing" "yeah cheers, I fiddled around with them 'til they were bigger than last year's"

Work Biscuits Card

£2.25

"right Steve, come on what are you bringing to the table?" "I brought the biscuits?"

Stick It Up Your Arse Card

£2.25

"in an ideal world I'd tell you to stick this job up your arse"

Work Dress Code Card

£2.25

"We don't have a dress code as such, but I would appreciate it if you could tone it down a bit"  

Pensions Accumulator Card

£2.25

"We don't currently have a pension scheme, but you're welcome to join in the office 7 horse accumulator" "I don't want to rush you but the first race is at 2.45"  

Work Bi-Lingual Card

£2.25

"I see from your CV that you're bilingual" "yeah English and Emoji"

Work From Home Card

£2.25

"we've decided we'd like you to work from home, preferably for someone else"  

Headphones Meeting Card

£2.25

"So there you have it, any questions?" "Run through that again will you, I had my headphones on"

Data Analyst Card

£2.25

"this spreadsheet of yours doesn't appear to make any sense" "yeah it's bollocks innit"  

Work at the Weekend Card

£2.25

"Can you come in at the weekend?" "̏'ll come in but I'm not fucking doing anything"

Key Strategy Meeting Card

£2.25

"first item, Peter would like to apologise for his absence, says he couldn't be fucked" Hone your business marketing plan with this inspiring card. Or not, if you can't really be arsed. Either is good.

Work Shit Meself Card

£2.25

"If I shit meself can I go home?"

Customer Feedback Card

£2.25

"great to get all this feedback off our new customer forum" "yeah I had no idea we were such a shit company"  

Birthday Day Off Card

£2.25

"I see you've applied for a day off on your birthday" "yeah, imagine being stuck in this shithole on your birthday" An apt birthday card for a colleague, employee, boss, or anyone who's used up all their holiday time and are feeling sorry for themselves.  

Successful Idea Card

£2.25

"Here's an idea, why don't we just do stuff that's going to be really massively successful?" Why think outside the box, when you don't have to think at all?    

One Bar Signal Card

£2.25

"Congratulations you've got the job!" "I dunno if I can work here, I'm only getting one bar on me phone"   Priorities, innit?

Early Retirement Card

£2.25

"I'm thinking of taking early retirement" "how early?" "about 2.30"    

Bored As Arseholes Card

£2.25

"I see from your afternoon tweet that you're bored as fucking arseholes" "yeah cheers, I didn't know you were following me"

Cambridge Card

£2.25

"and I see here you went to Cambridge" "yeah I had to drop something off for someone.I was back by half six" Perfect your interview technique with this Desperate Business greetings card.