Milestone Birthday Card

£2.50

"do you want to do anything for your milestone birthday coming up?" "no I fucking don't"   You can send this card direct to your mates or family with a handwritten message via Brainbox Candy here. Otherwise, add to basket below and write it your fucking self.

Birthday Present Card

£2.50

"didn't I give this to you for Christmas?" "yeah I didn't like it, happy birthday"   You can send this card direct to your mates or family with a handwritten message via Brainbox Candy here. Otherwise, add to basket below and write it your fucking self.

Birthday Day Off Card

£2.50

"I see you've applied for a day off on your birthday" "yeah, imagine being stuck in this shithole on your birthday" An apt birthday card for a colleague, employee, boss, or anyone who's used up all their holiday time and are feeling sorry for themselves.   You can send this card direct to your mates or family with a handwritten...

Tossary of Terms Book

£9.99

Welcome to Tossary of Terms, the first illustrated dictionary series by Modern Toss. This book identifies and defines, with new words and phrases, a random pisspot of contemporary social phenomena which has so far gone unnamed.  The fast changing modern scene chucks up stuff faster than we can nail it down and label it. The ear grease on a smart...

Cock Parcel Wrapping Paper

£1.50

Cock Parcel Wrapping Paper Get your shit-naks all wrapped up with this limited edition Birthday Cock Parcel Wrapping Paper! Sold in packs of 1, 2, 4 and 6.  Dimensions: 489mm x 692mm

Milestone Birthday Wrapping Paper

£1.50

Milestone Birthday Wrapping Paper Get your shit-naks all wrapped up for that special occasion with this limited edition Milestone Birthday Wrapping Paper.  Sold in packs of 1, 2, 4 and 6.  Dimensions: 489mm x 692mm

For Fuck's Sake Protest Mug

£12.00

For Fuck's Sake Protest Mug Protesting with a mug are ya? 2 FOR £20 ON MUGS AND TEA TOWELS Comes in a gift box Dishwasher and microwave safe New size: 9cm high x 8cm diameter Want something to drink your tea out of and somewhere to put it in between sips yeah? Combo it up with a coaster! Choose any square coaster from...

Like No Yeah Protest Mug

£12.00

Like No Yeah Protest Mug Protesting with a mug are ya? 2 FOR £20 ON MUGS AND TEA TOWELS Comes in a gift box Dishwasher and microwave safe New size: 9cm high x 8cm diameter   Want something to drink your tea out of and somewhere to put it in between sips yeah? Combo it up with a coaster! Choose any square coaster...

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The Working Day Colouring Book

£10.99 £7.99

The Working Day Colouring Book The Working Day colouring book captures the essence of the contemporary workplace while offering you the opportunity to express yourself through the relaxing medium of colouring in. Take some well-earned chill time and immerse yourself in the fractal complexity of a man flagging an important email, someone taking an afternoon Malteser break, a group of workers looking at meal deal options in...

Sale!

The Weekend Colouring Book

£10.99 £7.99

The Weekend Colouring Book Express your end-of-week frustrations by colouring in images depicting the joys of Saturday supermarket shopping, botched DIY projects, attending children’s sports games, visiting the in-laws, buying a takeaway and going out on the lash - the perfect catharsis in preparation for the looming spectre of Monday morning The Weekend colouring book captures the pleasures, challenges, and ridiculousness of...

Beer In Bed Card

£2.50

"On Your Special Day" Celebrate someone's birthday by bringing them a beer in bed. And this Stroller card. Sorted.   You can send this card direct to your mates or family with a handwritten message via Brainbox Candy here. Otherwise, add to basket below and write it your fucking self. 

Borrow 20 Quid Card

£2.50

"Dad can I borrow 20 quid to get you a birthday present?" "How about I just keep the 20 quid?" "That works for me, happy birthday yeah!"   You can send this card direct to your mates or family with a handwritten message via Brainbox Candy here. Otherwise, add to basket below and write it your fucking self. 

Perfume Buyer Card

£2.50

Introducing 15 new Modern Toss cards... Perfume Buyer Card "I'm after some perfume but I don't know what it's called, it's the one with an advert where a bloke kicks a wall down and tells some people to go away, then I'm pretty sure he rides off on a horse while a woman has an argument with an eagle in French and...

Walk in Wardrobe Card

£2.50

Introducing 15 new Modern Toss cards... Walk in Wardrobe Card "We've had an emergency call from a woman who's lost in a walk in wardrobe?"   You can send this card direct to your mates or family with a handwritten message via Brainbox Candy here. Otherwise, add to basket below and write it your fucking self. 

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Go For It Yeah Card

£2.50 £1.25

"Happy Birthday - Go For It Yeah!" Boost a friend's body image with this encouraging Stroller birthday card.   You can send this card direct to your mates or family with a handwritten message via Brainbox Candy here. Otherwise, add to basket below and write it your fucking self. 

Moody Cunt Card

£2.50

"Happy Birthday You Moody Cunt" Send many happy returns of the day to the moody cunt in your life. Enough said.   You can send this card direct to your mates or family with a handwritten message via Brainbox Candy here. Otherwise, add to basket below and write it your fucking self. 

Segway Bat Card

£2.50

HAPPY BIRTHDAY Taken from the Mindless Violence Colouring Book   You can send this card direct to your mates or family with a handwritten message via Brainbox Candy here. Otherwise, add to basket below and write it your fucking self. 

Modern Toss Comic - Issue 10

£6.99

Comic 10: Shit for Brains Introducing the 10th comic from Modern Toss - a brand new 64-page collection of single panel jokes covering a range of topics from retail to relationships and featuring classic cartoons from all the favourites: Work, Cheese & Wine and Awkward Cunt. Plus brand new hilarity from Liberty Taker, Legal Longshots, and Pete Peters.     ...

Jetty Zen Kick Card

£2.50

Beautiful surroundings and chilled out zen vibe for this Birthday message.   You can send this card direct to your mates or family with a handwritten message via Brainbox Candy here. Otherwise, add to basket below and write it your fucking self. 

Cup Cake Mallet Card

£2.50

Cup cake stalls are not everyone's cup of tea. Fair enough.   You can send this card direct to your mates or family with a handwritten message via Brainbox Candy here. Otherwise, add to basket below and write it your fucking self. 

Do What You Want Card

£2.50

"It's Your Special Day - Do What You Fucking Want With it Yeah" A Stroller greetings card that captures the true spirit of celebration days: watching TV and doing fuck-all.   You can send this card direct to your mates or family with a handwritten message via Brainbox Candy here. Otherwise, add to basket below and write it your fucking self. 

18. BOLLOCKS YEAH? Card

£2.50

18. BOLLOCKS YEAH? Card NEW PROTEST CARDS FOR GETTING OLD. Sack it off. You can send this card direct to your mates or family with a handwritten message via Brainbox Candy here. Otherwise, add to basket below and write it your fucking self.

21. FOR FUCK'S SAKE Card

£2.50

21. FOR FUCK'S SAKE Card NEW PROTEST CARDS FOR GETTING OLD. You're how old? You can send this card direct to your mates or family with a handwritten message via Brainbox Candy here. Otherwise, add to basket below and write it your fucking self.

30. FOR FUCK'S SAKE Card

£2.50

30. FOR FUCK'S SAKE Card NEW PROTEST CARDS FOR GETTING OLD. You're how old? You can send this card direct to your mates or family with a handwritten message via Brainbox Candy here. Otherwise, add to basket below and write it your fucking self.

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