Father's Day King of DIY Card

£2.50

Fathers Day Fuck it DIY Card "Happy Father's Day to the King of DIY"   You can send this card direct to your old man with a handwritten message via Brainbox Candy here. Otherwise, add to basket below and write it your fucking self.

Father's Day Fucking Kids Card

£2.50

Fathers Day Fucking Kids Card "Someone has sent me a Father's Day card, probably one of those fucking kids I had"   You can send this card direct to your old man with a handwritten message via Brainbox Candy here. Otherwise, add to basket below and write it your fucking self.

Father's Day Fuck It DIY Card

£2.50

Fathers Day Fuck It DIY Card "Fuck it, it's Father's Day, I can do that DIY stuff next weekend"   You can send this card direct to your old man with a handwritten message via Brainbox Candy here. Otherwise, add to basket below and write it your fucking self.

Father's Day Piss Yourself Card

£2.50

Father's Day Piss Yourself Card "Happy Father's Day, try not to piss yourself when you fall asleep on the sofa"   You can send this card direct to your old man with a handwritten message via Brainbox Candy here. Otherwise, add to basket below and write it your fucking self.

Father's Day What Are They After Card

£2.50

Fathers Day What Are They After Card "Looks like you got a Father's Day card!" "Yeah? What are they fucking after?"   You can send this card direct to your old man with a handwritten message via Brainbox Candy here. Otherwise, add to basket below and write it your fucking self.

Father's Day Junk Mail Card

£2.50

Father's Day Junk Mail Card "Did you get the Father's Day card ok?" "Probably went in the bin, I've had a lot of junk mail lately"   You can send this card direct to your old man with a handwritten message via Brainbox Candy here. Otherwise, add to basket below and write it your fucking self.

Father's Day Borrow £20 Card

£2.50

Fathers Day Borrow £20 Card "Dad can I borrow 20 quid to get you a Father's Day present?" "How about if i just keep the 20 quid?" "That works for me, Happy Father's Day yeah!"   You can send this card direct to your old man with a handwritten message via Brainbox Candy here. Otherwise, add to basket below and write it...

Father's Day Sperm Donor Card

£2.50

Fathers Day Sperm Donor Card "blimey, you've got a lot of Father's Day cards" "yeah I used to be a sperm donor, I only went in there once"   You can send this card direct to your mates or family with a handwritten message via Brainbox Candy here. Otherwise, add to basket below and write it your fucking self.

Father's Day Doing Anything Special Card

£2.50

Fathers Day Doing Anything Special Card "doing anything special for Father's Day?" "yeah I thought I might sit on the toilet and read the paper"   You can send this card direct to your old man with a handwritten message via Brainbox Candy here. Otherwise, add to basket below and write it your fucking self.

Museum of Rave Card

£2.50

Introducing the latest edition of Modern Toss cards... Museum of Rave Card "You got a chill out room? Me dad's having a massive flashback"   You can send this card direct to your mates or family with a handwritten message via Brainbox Candy here. Otherwise, add to basket below and write it your fucking self.

Couch to 5k Card

£2.50

Introducing 15 new Modern Toss cards...  "yeah, I'm thinking of doing the couch to 5k programme? Can I take a look at your couches?"   You can send this card direct to your mates or family with a handwritten message via Brainbox Candy here. Otherwise, add to basket below and write it your fucking self. 

Fucking Old Bastard Card

£2.50

Periodic Table of Swearing Card range - Fucking Old Bastard Card The 21st century design classic, Periodic Table of Swearing, has now expanded into a range of seriously sweary greetings cards. Ideal for wishing someone Happy Birthday, Good Luck or any other reason why you'd buy someone a fucking card.    You can send this card direct to your mates or...

Prat In A Hat Card

£2.50

Periodic Table of Swearing Card range - Prat In A Hat Card The 21st century design classic, Periodic Table of Swearing, has now expanded into a range of seriously sweary greetings cards. Ideal for wishing someone Happy Birthday, Good Luck or any other reason why you'd buy someone a fucking card.    You can send this card direct to your mates...

You Look Like A Tit Card

£2.50

Periodic Table of Swearing Card range - You Look Like A Tit Card The 21st century design classic, Periodic Table of Swearing, has now expanded into a range of seriously sweary greetings cards. Ideal for wishing someone Happy Birthday, Good Luck or any other reason why you'd buy someone a fucking card.    You can send this card direct to your...

Chillaxative Card

£2.50

Tossary of Terms card range - Chillaxative Card From the Tossary of Terms book which identifies and defines new words and phrases with a random pisspot of contemporary social phenomena which has so far gone unnamed.    You can send this card direct to your mates or family with a handwritten message via Brainbox Candy here. Otherwise, add to basket below and...

Pauled Pork Card

£2.50

Tossary of Terms card range - Pauled Pork Card Lifted from The Tossary of Terms, which identifies and defines new words and phrases for a random pisspot of contemporary social phenomena which has so far gone unnamed.    You can send this card direct to your mates or family with a handwritten message via Brainbox Candy here. Otherwise, add to basket below...

Tossary of Terms Book

£9.99

Welcome to Tossary of Terms, the first illustrated dictionary series by Modern Toss. This book identifies and defines, with new words and phrases, a random pisspot of contemporary social phenomena which has so far gone unnamed.  The fast changing modern scene chucks up stuff faster than we can nail it down and label it. The ear grease on a smart...

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Work Fuck Off Socks

£8.99 £5.99

The ultimate work sock, contains a powerful message which remains hidden underneath the bottom of trouser leg, unless you’re wearing shorts or a skirt.   Mens shoe size 7-11 80% Cotton 19% Polyamade 1% Elastane

Decade Book

£28.00

'The Best Book Ever' – The Sunday Times Style Magazine  'You will shit yourself laughing.' – The Idler 'Already a contemporary cartoon classic.' – The Guardian 'No one captures the frustrations of modern British life more acutely, or scurrilously, than Modern Toss.' – The Independent SOLD OUT! This incredible collection documents the Modern Toss story from the very beginning, with...

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The Weekend Colouring Book

£10.99 £7.99

The Weekend Colouring Book Express your end-of-week frustrations by colouring in images depicting the joys of Saturday supermarket shopping, botched DIY projects, attending children’s sports games, visiting the in-laws, buying a takeaway and going out on the lash - the perfect catharsis in preparation for the looming spectre of Monday morning The Weekend colouring book captures the pleasures, challenges, and ridiculousness of...

Modern Toss Comic - Issue 10

£6.99

Comic 10: Shit for Brains Introducing the 10th comic from Modern Toss - a brand new 64-page collection of single panel jokes covering a range of topics from retail to relationships and featuring classic cartoons from all the favourites: Work, Cheese & Wine and Awkward Cunt. Plus brand new hilarity from Liberty Taker, Legal Longshots, and Pete Peters.     ...

Periodic Table A5 Notebook

£8.99

Periodic Table of Swearing Notebook One of the 21st century's most cutting edge designs has been stuck on the cover of a notebook. The Periodic Table of Swearing contains over 100 swear elements including personal favourites, 'Stinks Like Piss', 'Who's The Prat In The Corner' and 'Stupid Cunt.' Perfect for taking notes in class or at work, while sneakily swearing...

Periodic Table Snap Gloss Case

£14.99

Got a phone yeah? Why not look after it with this high-quality phone case from the House of Toss. Scratch resistant, thin but strong as fuck and made out of some ultra durable wipe clean polycarbon bollocks. These snap-on cases cover the back and sides of the phone with easy access to all holes for sticking wires in. PRICE INCLUDES...

Do What You Want Card

£2.50

"It's Your Special Day - Do What You Fucking Want With it Yeah" A Stroller greetings card that captures the true spirit of celebration days: watching TV and doing fuck-all.   You can send this card direct to your mates or family with a handwritten message via Brainbox Candy here. Otherwise, add to basket below and write it your fucking self. 

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