Father's Day Shit Box

£25.00

Father's Day Shit Box *2 x cans of Horse Piss lager**2 x cans of Space Stout**4 x Toss beer mats**A pair of Periodic Swear Socks**Comic 10: Shit For Brains**Work Wrapping Paper**Father's Day - Doing Anything Special* Contains the last ever batch of Modern Toss beer. Also makes an excellent Birthday gift, yeah? 

Fathers Day Borrow £20 Card

£2.25

Fathers Day Borrow £20 Card "Dad can I borrow 20 quid to get you a Father's Day present?" "How about if i just keep the 20 quid?" "That works for me, Happy Father's Day yeah!"

Fathers Day Sperm Donor Card

£2.25

Fathers Day Sperm Donor Card "blimey, you've got a lot of Father's Day cards" "yeah I used to be a sperm donor, I only went in there once"

Fathers Day Doing Anything Special Card

£2.25

Fathers Day Doing Anything Special Card   "doing anything special for Father's Day?" "yeah I thought I might sit on the toilet and read the paper"  

Cloth Piss Bundle

£36.00

Fight the cold weather by matching up one of our NEW t-shirts up with one of our latest beer releases in our special 'Cloth-Piss Bundle’.   See our new and improved returns system here.

Horse Piss & Space Stout

£32.00

ONLINE EXCLUSIVE! Horse Piss Premium Pilsner Lager - 330ml - 4.2% vol - 1.4 UK Units 'Horse Piss' was an instant classic and has been re-sampled for a second batch. The majestic graphics have been shit tweaked for this special occasion (30% bigger horse on the front.) This refreshing pale craft lager is made using the best German malt, hops and yeast...

Horse Piss Lager

£17.00

ONLINE EXCLUSIVE! Horse Piss Premium Pilsner Lager - 330ml - 4.2% vol - 1.4 UK Units Horse Piss was an instant classic and has been re-sampled for a second batch. The majestic graphics have been shit tweaked for this special occasion (30% bigger horse on the front.) This refreshing pale craft lager is made using the best German malt, hops and yeast...

Space Stout

£17.00

ONLINE EXCLUSIVE! Space Stout Irish Style - 330ml - 4% - 1.3 UK Units 'Space Stout' is a smooth dark, full bodied craft stout with rich roasted barley malts, inspired by the incompetent Toss moon technicians 'Space Argument.' This seasonally appropriate drink is perfect to help you through the reduced daylight hours of late 2018. You're staring into the black...

Tossary of Terms Book

£9.99

Welcome to Tossary of Terms, the first in an illustrated dictionary series produced by cult cartoonists Modern Toss. This book identifies and defines, with new words and phrases, a random pisspot of contemporary social phenomena which has so far gone unnamed.  The fast changing modern scene chucks up stuff faster than we can nail it down and label it. The...

Periodic Table of Swearing Socks

£8.99

The Periodic Table of Swearing is an acknowledged 21st century design classic and now, thanks to advances in weaving technology, is available to wear on your feet as a pair of socks. Contains 14 handpicked swear elements beautifully knitted into this classic argyle style design. Mens shoe size 7-11 80% Cotton 19% Polyamade 1% Elastane

Work Fuck Off Socks

£8.99

The ultimate work sock, contains a powerful message which remains hidden underneath the bottom of trouser leg, unless you’re wearing shorts or a skirt. Mens shoe size 7-11 80% Cotton 19% Polyamade 1% Elastane

Modern Toss Comic - Issue 10

£6.99

Comic 10: 'Shit for Brains' Introducing the 10th comic from Modern Toss - a brand new 64-page collection of single panel jokes covering a range of topics from retail to relationships and featuring classic cartoons from all the favourites: Work, Cheese & Wine and Awkward Cunt. Plus brand new hilarity from Liberty Taker, Legal Longshots, and Pete Peters.     ...

Decade Book

£28.00

'The Best Book Ever' – The Sunday Times Style Magazine  'You will shit yourself laughing.' – The Idler 'Already a contemporary cartoon classic.' – The Guardian 'No one captures the frustrations of modern British life more acutely, or scurrilously, than Modern Toss.' – The Independent This incredible collection documents the Modern Toss story from the very beginning, with 560pages and...

Alan Horse Piss T-Shirt

£25.00

Alan Horse Piss T-Shirt This classic horse based design has been shit-tweaked to perfectly compliment our stunning Horse Piss Beer cans. Available in Small (50cm), Medium (53cm), Large (56cm) and Extra Large (60cm) 100% Cotton. Made in UK with Continental Clothing t-shirts.   See our new and improved returns system here.

Drive-by Abuser T-Shirt

£25.00

Drive-by Abuser T-Shirt Wearin’ a t-shirt yeah?  Why not it’s your life, see you 'round yeah.  Available in Small (50cm), Medium (53cm), Large (56cm) and Extra Large (60cm) 100% Cotton. Made in UK with Continental Clothing t-shirts.   See our new and improved returns system here.  

Space Argument Black T-Shirt

£25.00

Space Argument Black T-Shirt From the classic Space Argument series, this design is now printed on a black shirt, for extra 'space' effect. Available in Small (50cm), Medium (53cm), Large (56cm) and Extra Large (60cm) 100% Cotton. Made in UK with Continental Clothing t-shirts.   See our new and improved returns system here.

Mindless Violence Colouring Book

£10.99

Mindless Violence Colouring Book Achieve a mindful state as you colour in these adrenaline-soaked scenes of mindless violence, created for you by a dedicated team of plain clothes therapists. Experience an overwhelming sense of inner peace as you immerse yourself and your pencils in a world of detail and surprises, including: a man bending a lamppost; a woman setting about a fruit tree with a...

Weekend TV Controls Card

£2.25

Too fucked to get the TV controls? So you're just going to have to sit through this Sunday night costume drama then! Also works with Poldark.

Do What You Want Card

£2.25

"It's Your Special Day - Do What You Fucking Want With it Yeah" A Stroller greetings card that captures the true spirit of celebration days: watching TV and doing fuck-all.

Beer In Bed Card

£2.25

"On Your Special Day" Celebrate someone's birthday by bringing them a beer in bed. And this Stroller card. Sorted.

Special Day Dustbin Card

£2.25

It's your special day. Sit around, have a little walkabout, drink some beer and honk your guts up into a dustbin. Classic.  

Sale!

Play To Win Card

£2.25 £1.00

"You Play To Win" A Stroller card for the discerning sportsman.