'Avin it Card

£2.95

"Mum, grandad's talking about acid house again"   You can send this card direct to your mates or family with a handwritten message via Brainbox Candy here. Otherwise, add to basket below and write it your effing self.

Anti-Social Networking Card

£2.95

Introducing the latest edition of Modern Toss cards... Anti-Social Networking Card "I see you've sent me another friend request"   You can send this card direct to your mates or family with a handwritten message via Brainbox Candy here. Otherwise, add to basket below and write it your effing self.

Awkward Cunt Pastries Card

£2.95

"do you want any cakes or pastries with that?" "if I wanted them I probably would have fucking asked for them"   You can send this card direct to your mates or family with a handwritten message via Brainbox Candy here. Otherwise, add to basket below and write it your effing self. 

Back In The Day Card

£2.95

"See that field with the animal in it, I was fully off me nut right by that sheep trough back in '89"   You can send this card direct to your mates or family with a handwritten message via Brainbox Candy here. Otherwise, add to basket below and write it your effing self.

Before and After Internet Card

£2.95

Just look how far we've come.   You can send this card direct to your mates or family with a handwritten message via Brainbox Candy here. Otherwise, add to basket below and write it your effing self.

Best Version Card

£2.95

Share some Toss Inspirationals on a greeting card.   You can send this card direct to your mates or family with a handwritten message via Brainbox Candy here. Otherwise, add to basket below and write it your effing self.

Bird Feeder Card

£2.95

Introducing the latest edition of Modern Toss cards...  Bird Feeder Card "I started putting food out for them, now I can't keep up with their demands"   You can send this card direct to your mates or family with a handwritten message via Brainbox Candy here. Otherwise, add to basket below and write it your effing self.

Bollocks To This Card

£2.95

"it's definitely Peter, I recognise the handwriting"   You can send this card direct to your mates or family with a handwritten message via Brainbox Candy here. Otherwise, add to basket below and write it your effing self.

Book From Grandad Card

£2.95

"look, Grandad's bought you a book" "how d'you turn it on?"   You can send this card direct to your mates or family with a handwritten message via Brainbox Candy here. Otherwise, add to basket below and write it your effing self. 

Botox Special Card

£2.95

"If I put any more in you won't be able to move anything" "That's what I'm after love, I've got a big poker tournament coming up"   You can send this card direct to your mates or family with a handwritten message via Brainbox Candy here. Otherwise, add to basket below and write it your effing self.

Brow Bar Card

£2.95

"I've got a big meeting coming up, can you make me look like I'm really interested" If you pay extra you can get them tattooed on so that you permanently look like you're questioning your choices in life.   You can send this card direct to your mates or family with a handwritten message via Brainbox Candy here. Otherwise, add to...

Bubble Life Podcast Card

£2.95

Introducing the latest lockdown edition of Modern Toss cards... 'Bubble Life Podcast' "I'm thinking about doing a podcast about not going on holiday" "I'm thinking about doing a podcast about not listening to your podcast about not going on holiday" "Sounds good, maybe I'll just listen to that instead"   You can send this card direct to your mates or...

Bubble Life Streaming Card

£2.95

Introducing the latest edition of Modern Toss cards... 'Bubble Life Streaming' "Do you wanna join me live streaming myself watching someone live streaming themselves playing a guitar?" "Yeah in a bit, I'm just tiktokking myself eating biscuit"  Desperate Business cartoon first showed in Private Eye You can send this card direct to your mates or family with a printed message via...

Buggering Old Twat Card

£2.95

Periodic Table of Swearing Card range - Buggering Old Twat Card The 21st century design classic, Periodic Table of Swearing, has now expanded into a range of seriously sweary greetings cards. Ideal for wishing someone Happy Birthday, Good Luck or any other reason why you'd buy someone a fucking card.    You can send this card direct to your mates or family...

Chill Out Yeah Card

£2.95

  You what?   You can send this card direct to your mates or family with a handwritten message via Brainbox Candy here. Otherwise, add to basket below and write it your effing self.

Chillaxative Card

£2.95

Tossary of Terms card range - Chillaxative Card Deliberately listening to pan pipe music till you shit yourself. From the Tossary of Terms book which identifies and defines new words and phrases with a random pisspot of contemporary social phenomena which has so far gone unnamed.    You can send this card direct to your mates or family with a handwritten...

Cock Bonnet Card

£2.95

Tossary of Terms card range - Cock Bonnet Card Floppy men's cap popularised by Tv series Peaky Blinders. From the Tossary of Terms which identifies and defines new words and phrases, with a random pisspot of contemporary social phenomena which has so far gone unnamed.    You can send this card direct to your mates or family with a handwritten message...

Community Spirit Card

£2.95

Introducing the latest lockdown edition of Modern Toss cards... 'Community Spirit' Card "alright mate, do you wanna buy my supermarket delivery slot?"  Desperate Business cartoon from Private Eye. You can send this card direct to your mates or family with a printed message via Brainbox Candy here. Otherwise, add to basket below and write it your effing self.

Couch to 5k Card

£2.95

Introducing 15 new Modern Toss cards...  "yeah, I'm thinking of doing the couch to 5k programme? Can I take a look at your couches?"   You can send this card direct to your mates or family with a handwritten message via Brainbox Candy here. Otherwise, add to basket below and write it your effing self. 

Customer Services Piss Myself Card

£2.95

"this drink I bought off you, made me piss myself"

Do What You Want Card

£2.95

"It's Your Special Day - Do What You Fucking Want With it Yeah" A Stroller greetings card that captures the true spirit of celebration days: watching TV and doing fuck-all.   You can send this card direct to your mates or family with a handwritten message via Brainbox Candy here. Otherwise, add to basket below and write it your effing self. 

Dogs Pet Shop Card

£2.95

Introducing 15 new Modern Toss cards... Dogs Pet Shop Card "and this is our most domesticated breed" "before I go anywhere, ask them how fast their broadband speed is at home"   You can send this card direct to your mates or family with a handwritten message via Brainbox Candy here. Otherwise, add to basket below and write it your effing self. 

Dream Writer Card

£2.95

Share some Toss Inspirationals on a greeting card.   You can send this card direct to your mates or family with a handwritten message via Brainbox Candy here. Otherwise, add to basket below and write it your effing self.

Drive-By Golf Card

£2.95

Drive-By Golf Card Introducing our new Drive-By Abuser card collection...     "you playing golf are ya? yeah!" You can send this card direct to your mates or family with a handwritten message via Brainbox Candy here. Otherwise, add to basket below and write it your effing self.

Net Orders Checkout

Item Price Qty Total
Subtotal £0.00
Shipping
Total

Shipping Address

Shipping Methods